Swine Flu jokes..
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Thread: Swine Flu jokes..

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Fraserburgh , Scotland
    Posts
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    Default Swine Flu jokes..

    A Lion , Bear and Pig are sitting around discussing how hard they each are. The Lion says "When I ROAR the whole Jungle shakes".

    The Bear says "When I roar the whole forest trembles".

    "So What !", says the Pig , "All I have to do is sneeze and the whole world shits itself !!"
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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Fraserburgh , Scotland
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    Default

    Wife runs out of petrol and phones her husband...

    "I'm scared to fill up 'cos of this swine flu."

    He says "You daft neep its in Mexico not TEXACO ya eejit !!"

  3. #3

    Default

    We've had Bird Flu,Killed all the birds
    We've got Swine Flu..Kill all the pigs
    What will happen if we get Asian Flu


    Someone once said if ever there is a black president pigs will fly.
    After a 100 days "Swine Flew"


    Phoned the NHS Helpline about Swine Flu.
    It was a bad line all i got was "crackling"

    I think I've got Swine Flu
    I keep comeing out in "rashes".

  4. #4

    Default

    If you get Swine Flu rub salt all over yourself.
    You'll soon be cured.

    My mate said he has Swine flu
    I think he's telling porkies.

    You'll know you have Swine Flu
    If you wake up with an apple in your mouth.

  5. #5

    Default

    New Swine flu outbreak found

    60000 Celtic fans as sick as pigs

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Oban
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    Default top of the table

    Oh what a smug man you are to-night Mr.Beedie...you'd better hope they don't fall at the last fence or you and Sandy will be sneaking out the country in disguise and under cover of darkness (with me carrying your cases) !!!!!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    north east
    Posts
    4

    Default frankb

    with swine flu spreading fast, kermit the frog now wishes he had used protection shagging miss piggy, what a bloody muppet

  8. #8

    Default

    If you get swine flu just go to the doctor and ask for a prescription for,

















    Oinkment!!!!!!!!.

  9. #9

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Scotland
    Posts
    73

    Default

    And the big bad wolf bellowed "I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house down!!!"


    "F**k off!!", cried the little pig, "Or I'll sneeze on you!"

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